Saturday, November 08, 2008

Nine Kinds of Hell

Being married to a drug addict is nine kinds of hell. Even one who is supposedly recovering.

Right now, I am so angry, I am trembly.

My recovering addict husband has relapsed. Proof? All circumstantial. But our cell phone records show that he called a known pill dealer at 3:30 and 4:00 this morning. He was unreachable for about 8 hours. Finally, he called and asked where I was. (He had asked me to be at his place about dark.) I asked him why I couldn't reach him. He said he fell asleep. Wrong answer. I had campus police check on whether his car was in the lot. He wasn't home. He hung up on me.

I want out.

I stayed with him for the sake of our daughter. She is grown now. I stayed while he was in rehab, and I lived with his parents while I worked two jobs to make it possible for him to go to school. I'm done.

It's all very sad.


1 comment:

SingingSkies said...

Oh, my!

The circumstantial seems farily convincing to me. Sounds like it's indeed time to get out. You been quite supportive of your hustand in his recovery and in his career; however, it's not wise to put your own sobriety and sanity in jeopardy. You deserve so much more.

Yes, it is very sad.

You have the resources to move forward, and it sounds like you have either reached a point of completion for yourself or the end of your rope. (Maybe both?)

Hang in there and do what's important for you! You'll be in my prayers.